Day Seven

This is seriously fucked off. I have slept like shit this entire week. Is this diet fucking with anyone else’s precious slumber? Because goddamn it I need my beauty sleep! This trashy stripper look I rock requires at least 8 hours. If I keep getting less than that, I’ll start looking like more meth-hooker than trashy stripper. Nobody wants that. So now I’ve got marshmallow cravings and I meth problem? How is this improving my health???

Me: Maybe I should just find a meth dealer. Or learn how to make my own so that it’s organic and complies with this fucking diet.
Scale: 5.5 lbs total lost this week
Me: Or not.

Today I attended belated holiday party at with my department for The Job. A wine and desert holiday party. I brought a berry tray. I ate the shit out of those berries too while everyone else enjoyed, cheesecake, Mississippi Mud, Better Than Sex Cake, Marble Cake…you get the idea. A co-workers husband didn’t make it all the way in the door before he zeroed in on the glass of sparkling water in my hand had there been a record player playing it would have screeched to silence as he tried to process what he was seeing. Surprisingly I’ve only had to fuel the pregnancy suspicions from one person thus far. After that we had a birthday party for a friend; a good friend who had a babysitter and was going to make the most of it by knocking back as many Patron shots as he could. I was in! I could totally hang in a bar with them and not drink! Until they mentioned they had a limo and were going to Dirty in Portland. I sent WMFS on his way and took my sober ass home. OMFG I kinda hate me right now. But that five and a half pounds this week has made me even more determined to ride this out.

Food consumed:
Water
Strawberry, mango, spinach smoothie
Salmon and tuna sashimi
Blueberries, raspberries, blackberries, fresh whipped cream
3 meatballs, 3 pieces of cheese, carrots, grape tomatoes, sugar peas
More berries
Water

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