Turns Out Maturity Does Not Always Come With (Advanced) Age

Last Thursday we arrived at Shanahan’s at 4:30 for the St. Patrick’s Day festivities. The front room was packed so we headed to the back and it was just as jammed. One of the servers noticed us as we walked in and said a booth had just opened up and we’d better run. Well a woman sitting on a bench against the wall overheard her and jumped up to run to grab it herself. Fortunately Karma had other plans for her and she tripped and stumbled injuring herself enough to slow her down. I went around the other side of the pool table slipped between a couple that was clearly confused by the mass of people and tossed my purse  5 feet or so on to the table. VICTORY! STEP OFF BITCH! What? Shanahan’s is the place to be on St. Patrick’s Day and we needed a home base for coats, bags, plates of corned beef and cabbage and beer stores. You would’ve done the same thing and you know it.

When WMFS returned with our iced teas  he commented that it smelled like moth balls, maybe sawdust, and it wasn’t a dig against anyone it really did smell like moth balls and I started looking around at the other Irish-for-a-day patrons. And if you weren’t there to see it you may not believe me but there was a group of about 40 people who’s ages ranged from what I would guess were 55 to 99. There were canes and I’m pretty sure at least one walker. It was a fucking gang of geriatrics! It was a sight to behold and I fucking took to Facebook and posted as much!

Here’s how it went down:

While it isn’t my wittiest post it certainly isn’t my most offensive. Or so I thought. Red took issue with it, as you can see by her comments. Yellow, who is in the age group as well clearly didn’t and posted the best comment of the bunch because it pretty much sums up his St. Patrick’s Day.

Fun Size got a message from Red today saying she was no longer coming to Happy Hour Hot Topics. And I wouldn’t be suspicious that this was the reason on its own, maybe she’s too busy with other commitments, maybe she just isn’t 100% after a recent surgery, but not this? So I went to my friends list to pull her up and shoot her a message to make sure. And people, she unfriended me. Like a 17-year-old little girl, she unfriended me. What the ever-loving fuck?

Should I feel bad? It was her age group that I posted about, but certainly not her peers. Red is incredibly active, bright, funny, she dresses fabulously and everyone adores her. The geriatric gang? Not so much. I think our server had to check a couple of them for signs of life.

The next day I learned that they are a 40+ (no shit?) singles group, most of them ordered coffee or water and they didn’t tip their server for shit despite taking up 40 seats in the back room on the bars busiest day of the year. There was a line to get in! These old ass farts seriously cut into the revenue for the night, I guaranfuckingtee it! Given those circumstances I don’t feel a bit bad about posting about their lame asses.

What really yanks my chain is that this intelligent woman in her 70’s gets her support hose in a bunch and reacts as though she’s in high school. Someone please explain this to me?


    • Miss. Mandy
    • March 22nd, 2011

    It didnt take me long to figure out who you were talking about lmao

    F’em if they cant take a joke.

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